a struggle.

still finding it difficult
not to dream.

at what point should i allow
my heart to catch up with my head?

i am thinking,
when she is home safe in our arms.
that is the the only reasonable option.

we have filled out the application,
almost completely.

when we send it in,
we will know within ten working days
whether we are accepted into the Rwanda program.

and then the paper trail begins,
along with the home study.

at times it feels like we are about to jump off a cliff.

and whether we land safely or not,
is not really the issue,
but that once we jump,
we can't go back.

oh how ready i am to not go back.